Caitlin Liveblogs 50 Shades Darker: Chapter 22 [Part 1]
“Kate! This is nothing to do with you.” I glare venomously at her, anger replacing my fear. How dare she do this? Not now, not today. Not on Christian’s birthday.
In case you are wondering, when we last left off, Kate had just found a copy of one of Ana’s emails discussing the Dom/Sub contract with Christian, and Kate is now angrily waving it in their faces.
And that is how Ana responds.
Her friend is honestly concerned about her, for VERY GOOD REASON, and all Ana says is “THIS IS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.”
Pardon me, it has EVERYTHING to do with her, because she’s your BEST GODDAMNED FRIEND.
Also you guys are going to get married and have a healthy, loving, not-fucked up relationship and it’ll be great. You just need to accept that.
And then Ana just keeps saying “Kate, it’s fine, I love him, I’m happy.” and Kate just accepts that.
“I love you so much, Ana, like my own sister. I just thought…I didn’t know what to think. I’m sorry. If you’re happy, then I’m happy.”
NO YOU LOVE HER LIKE YOUR OWN WIFE BECAUSE YOU TWO ARE CLEARLY IN LESBIANS WITH EACH OTHER.
STOP PRETENDING.
And then Christian announces their engagement. Boring.
OH SHIT BUT MRS. ROBINSON (ELENA) IS THERE.
AWWW SHIT. EVERYBODY IN THE PLACE HIT THE MOTHER FUCKING DECK. SHIT IS ABOUT TO GET REAL.
But before shit gets real, Christian and Ana meet Christian’s psychiatrist, Dr. Flynn. Who is British. And in case you aren’t aware that he’s British, here’s proof:
“That was one googly you bowled there, Christian,” Dr. Flynn shakes his head in amused disbelief. Christian frowns at him.
“John—you and your cricket metaphors.” Rhian rolls her eyes.
BECAUSE PEOPLE FROM GREAT BRITAIN JUST WALK AROUND SPOUTING CRICKET METAPHORS.
