Caitlin Liveblogs 50 Shades Freed: Chapter 3 [Part 1]
LET’S ALL JUMP INTO THE WAY-BACK MACHINE AND GO BACK TO CHAPTER 2.
Just as a refresher: Ana and Christian have sex (BET YOU WEREN’T EXPECTING THAT ONE) and he puts her in handcuffs and leaves all kinds of marks all over her…
Alright. Time for Chapter 3.
I gaze in horror at the red marks all over my breasts. Hickeys! I have hickeys!
….
YOU’RE ON YOUR HONEYMOON. I’M PRETTY SURE NO ONE IS GOING TO JUDGE YOU FOR HAVING A FEW HICKEYS.
Also they’re on your boobs, and I doubt you’re going to be showing those off to everyone in Europe, seeing as how the last time you did that Christian got you drunk all so he could tell you not to pee and put you in handcuffs and apparently suck on your boobs like he’s a fucking leech-man.
My wrists have a red welt around them from the handcuffs. No doubt they’ll bruise. I examine my ankles—more welts. Holy hell, I look like I’ve been in some sort of accident.
No, you don’t look like you’ve been in an accident, you look like a domestic abuse victim, which you pretty much are because he GOT YOU DRUNK YOU HE COULD PUT YOU IN HANDCUFFS.
How dare he mark me like this, like some teenager. In the short time we’ve been together, he’s never given me hickeys. I look like hell.
WHY ARE YOU UPSET ABOUT THE HICKEYS AND NOT THE GIANT RED WELTS/BRUISES FORMING AROUND YOUR WRISTS AND ANKLES FROM THE HANDCUFFS.
HICKEYS ARE NORMAL. WELTS AND BRUISES ARE NOT.
